Genres

Visitors Review

TheUnknown837-1 2012-05-22 18:08:14

Only one word can describe this movie: pathetic

Boa vs. Python (obviously inspired by AVP: Alien Vs. Predator) is very,very, VERY stupid. United Film Organization (UFO) Productions took twoof their low-budget snakes and pitted them against each other (gee,what'd you expect?) Anyways, this movie sucks. First of all, I don'teven know why it's called Boa vs. Python because the snakes don't evenfight until the very end and the battle's only on for a few minutes.Two, the snakes mate and produce eggs (is that even possible tocrossbreed boas and pythons?). Three, they don't even explain where thePython came from or how it was captured. And if it was captured, whydidn't they just use the same routine to re-capture it? Four, dialogueand acting is terrible. And five, we have some un-necessaries such asthe part where we see some woman taking a bubble bath. In front of ourown eyes! Don't allow young children to look at those parts. And goingto the good parts of the film...well, there is only one good part. TheCGI is actually pretty darn good. The snakes now look halfway realisticfor once, but when are they going to learn that snakes do not growl androar and stuff like that? Oh, and another thing, on the DVD cover, theyshow the snakes in a city scene with a helicopter firing a missile atthem. The snakes fought in some kind of a social club and in a subwaytunnel (guess how they die?) And there was no helicopter involved.

2012-05-22 06:08:26

Just not as much fun as I had hoped...

The thing that struck me as unique about this movie was the roll of Agent Sharpe played by Kirk Woller. Usually the guy in charge refuses to believe what is happening and by the time he realizes their impending doom, it's too late and the carnage begins. Within about 5 seconds of hearing that 2 deaths have occurred at a local water treatment plant (and with the aid of a just discovered giant scale as the only clue) Agent Sharpe immediately solves the mystery then spits out a detailed 47 step plan of action from shutting down the plant and limiting access to the area to acquiring the services of a nearby government issue gigantic Boa Constrictor to hunt for the rogue Python. Has this guy been waiting his whole life for this scenario to occur? You're thinking "No way! Never in a million years does this happen". His plan has more holes than Sonny Corleone's car at a New Jersey ticket booth but to spit that plan out on the fly was quite impressive, totally unbelievable but impressive. There was some hope for this movie...I will also praise the explanation behind the giant Boa existing in the lab. It seems pretty believable in the realm of Sci-Fi B-movies that David Hewlett's character would be trying to create a universal snake anti-venom by feeding small poisonous snakes to his giant Boa Constrictor and using it's blood as anti-venom. Nicely done.And the special giant snake effects were not totally atrocious. I'd prefer to see the blatant use of a man in a rubber suit in full daylight (see "Alien 3000") which always gets me into the mood for a good laugher of a bad movie but the effects were passable.But of course other than that, the movie falls apart with plot holes and stereotypical character flaws and into the schlock we expect. The assumption that the Boa can do anything to stop the Python is lame not to mention that there are about 1,000 better ways to catch or kill the snake than to compound the problem by releasing another one. And how was the lab isolated Boa pregnant in the first place? Hello? Give me something here. Don't tell my Mr. Python is the father in record time. O.K. fine, set up the sequel if you must. Not that this movie really ends in the first place. The opening credit sound track sounds like something more appropriate for an Atari 2600 video game circa 1979. Da da da da, da da da da, digitally replicated over and over again ad nauseam.Angel Boris does her award winning plot independent nude scene which is not a complaint by any stretch of the imagination. She's hot and I rented the movie because of her. I remember her from "General Hospital", "Las Vegas" and "Fear Factor" and she reminds me of the typical actress struggling in Hollywood using her assets to get parts until he big break. Actually, she does seem to be steadily improving, she probably has the most believable part in the movie and is afforded the luxury of playing it straight, unlike most of the painfully over the top portrayals here. The father and son hunting team is more painful than the sound track! Final ratings: ***-Angel Boris , ***1/2-Boa (Immaculate conception sub plot), **-Python (At least he kills almost everyone in the movie!): Summary: Just not as much fun as I had hoped. Needed to have had much more gore and some over the top carnage to overlook the plot flaws. Definitely needed more humor for this genre. Maybe more skin as well. Overall ***

ConservativeCat 2012-05-18 20:40:43

This film made me the man I am today...

by making me truly appreciate the power of a horrible film. This wasthe first poor film I saw, but certainly wasn't the last."Say, Billy! I hear you want to make a movie. Well, sit back and I'llgive you a few pointers about movie making: Your female protagonistshould be sexy, and, if possible, loose her top at least once duringthe film. This will keep your bored audience at attention, waiting foranother possible slip. Well, if they're male. Millionaires are idiots,all of them. Remember, they may have displayed some prowess makingtheir fortunes by their late 20s and early 30s, but it was all luck.Leave a few questions unanswered, and try to stuff a sex scene insomewhere. Running out of money for your budget? Buy off a few minorfolks to serve as actors. Models will serve. Beef up those graphics.Remember, the government is incompetent on how to deal with monsters."Seriously, this film deserves a place in your hall of fame. Ioriginally watched it on the Sci-Fi channel, and, despite the poorquality, kept watching it in hopes that the lovely Jaime Bergman wouldshow more of herself. It starts out somewhat believable. This richyoung man (trying to pose himself as a tough guy) and his sexy,masculine girlfriend are hanging out. Eventually, the girl pulls out agun, and the two of them hop up to boink. These two morons have a bunchof equally stupid friends who are all ready and willing to hunt a hugereptile, which is brought in from outside the country. Their posse is abunch of clichéd, flat characters with nothing deeper than their accentand costumes. Over the course of the film, they all die, Jaime and astupid snake raiser release a big snake to slither off and slaughterthe enemy snake, the Python. Well, it ends up with one guy with a flamethrower killing some folks for no reason, getting eaten, then thePython dying in a subway. The Boa just kind of disappears.Ultimately, this film ends up being on a flimsy basis, with some crappyacting, poorly developed characters, and a more or less "by-the-book"storyline. By which, I mean, good guy gets the girl out of his league.This is all complete with the normal incompetence of FBI and governmentagents, since civilians are much more able to deal with a major crisis.It's all just a reason to show two snakes fighting each other. Overall, there were four valuable things I took from the film, and carrywith me.1) A nice bikini shot, and some brief nudity.2) Every Sci-Fi Channel movie follows the same basic plot, and arechocked full of red shirt characters.3) A fun new game to play with my girl friend. ("Hey, how do you catcha 100 foot snake?" "Get a bigger snake!" (By the way, the Boa, who wassupposed to capture the Python, was actually smaller... and the Pythonwasn't 100 feet.))4) An appreciation for crappy works of 'art', such as poor video gamesand movies. And for people who enjoy poor movies for the comedy, thisgains around a 7/10. However, for the mainstream, 2/10

Jason_fan 2012-05-18 08:34:07

Wow!

I'm very surprised at how many "versus" movies there are these days.First off, let me say that I wasn't expecting too much from this movie.Considering that Boa and Python 1 & 2 were all direct to video, I wasexpecting this one to be along the same lines. But, it wasn't.Right off the bat, we see the snakes--which is unusual, because in mostB-rated creature features, we don't see the abnormally sized creatureuntil at least half-way through. In this, we see the python near thebeginning.The deaths are more elaborate and bloody (one features a man being bitin half!), and the plot is slightly better. The actors are still thesame: they insult our intelligence and can't act for their life.Boa vs. Python: Rated R for violence/gore, language, and somesexuality. 1.5/5

Joseph 2012-05-16 11:51:17

boa vs python

some of you thought this was only on dvd. WRONG!!!!!!!! in fact this actually 1st shown in scifi and when i watched it on there i thought that....hum.....this isnt what i expected but its still really good

2012-05-16 03:49:27

Pretty Cool

Not a bad Sci-Fi Channel Film. They never release a big hit and maybe never will. Boa Vs Python is a merging of the Boa and Python Films and it does and OK job with an original script and mediocre acting. the best part is the bad characters Girlfriend, can you say "Hot" and david hewlett(stargate atlantis). The FX are better than most of thier films and the ending is a little dry. but OK.

2012-05-12 09:35:14

BOA VS. PYTHON (PLEASE)

JAPEREZ SAN DIEGO, TEXAS. WHEN I FIRST SAW THIS MOVIE I DIDN'T LIKE IT. BOA AND PYTHON ONLY FOUGHT FOR THR LAST 10 MINUTES.THIS MOVIE SUCKED. THERE WAS NOTHING INTERESTING ABOUT IT. (DONT BUY THIS MOVIE.)

ghoulieguru 2012-05-11 17:38:51

It's scary... that this got made.

I'd like to think that someone got fired over this movie. The reallyamazing thing about Boa vs. Python is that it got made at all. Then,after it got made, it aired on the Sci-Fi Channel. Now, we all knowthat the Sci-Fi Channel is not exactly known for excellence inprogramming, but this is an all time low.The fact that someone pitched Boa vs. Python as a concept, and someoneelse said, "Yeah! Great!" is just plain frightening. I almost can'tblame the writer, the director, the actors, or the terrible CGFX team.They did what they had to do. The worst thing about Boa vs. Python isthat it came into existence at all. 2 out of 10 stars. One for thepython, one for the boa.

eclipsegsJ 2012-05-09 07:09:56

Okay but could've been better

Spoiler The story starts off having the python escaped and fled to anearby sewer; An FBI decided to visit some weirdo looking dude withthis chick who specialized in high tech gizmos. The snake guy has a boacalled Betty who he used for medical purposes. The two snakes aredistinguished by their colors. The python is green and Betty is red. Soanyway, the FBI dude decides to pit the the snakes together to thedeath using the girl's high tech gizmo implanted in Betty's brain tosee what she sees. At the same time, this dude which I don't know hisname is holding an all out hunting game. He invited all the hardcoremuscle bound freaks to do his dirty work for him. So anyway, the storybegins to unravel and they sends betty down the sewer to find thepython. Meanwhile, the python kills one of the huntsman and leaves atrail of chaos. So they track it down to the sewer where a bunch of FBIdudes were at. To make the story short, one by one they all end up deadexcept for the girl and snake guy who decided to hunt down Betty andher offspring who just had a nasty kick ass fight with the python. THEEND

jenniferles1000 2012-05-08 16:25:20

Two giant snakes head to head

As a lover of creature movies i had high hopes for this movie. itwasn't too bad but could of done with seeing more of the snakes Checkout Python its much better and great fun. The acting as with allcreature movies isn't top notch but the movie is played pretty muchwith its tongue in its cheek so It doesn't make to much difference whenthe snakes finally do clash later in the movie It really picks up butdoes not last nearly long enough. The effects are all CGI and are nottoo bad there are some scenes where the actors find it difficult topretend there is actually a snake there And sometimes the snakes look alittle fake but overall its worth checking out if like me you are a bigfan of creature movies otherwise you probably wont like it

muffet11 2012-05-05 07:53:11

Englands Newfound Action Star

I can't wait to see ADAM KENDRICK, the SEXY English ACTOR, in a biggerbudget film.He really gave guts to the character 'Broddick', and took what couldhave been a 'quasi-quasi' film into the realms of those great 'tonguein cheek' films made in the early days of the first James Bond 007'humourous but deadly' romps!Where are the studios looking for the stars of the future? They seem togo to the school play grounds to find a kid to dress as a grown-up andtell him to act like a 'swash-buckler' or 'spy'. Get real Hollywood! I believe we have found the next actor to play'007' when the current one bows out! AND he is a true BRIT. 'Tall, dark and handsome' for this guy is an understatement! And he isooooozing with hot sex appeal! All the right ingredients for anInternational Star!!!Everyone who has seen this film and this actor has said the same thing.As for the snakes? I would have liked to have seen him rip off theirheads and serve them up on a platter to all the lame people who didn'tget the humour in what they were watching! DUH!Oh, and those snakes were not real ones! Sorry to burst anyone'sbubble...C.G.I.anyone? Like Spiderman etc. etc.! ALL FAKE!If it hadn't been for Adam Kendrick bringing a 'kick-ass' performanceto Boa vs. Python, it would have just been another 'snake genre' film!!Next time, I want to see this actor jump out of a burning plane. Divein shark infested waters. Chase from falling rocks and boulders. Andsave the world from death and destruction. And walk away without awrinkle or smudge of dirt on his Armani or Brioni suit....And live to live another day...!!

Johann 2012-05-05 00:20:05

Hasn't the CGI giant snake/monster thing gone far enough?

I rented this flick while in the mood for some pretty cheesy schlock tocontinue my search for the worst movie ever made (this is a personalquest because no three people can agree on what is the worst movieever). This flick combines two CGI giant snakes that previously hadtheir own pieces of celluloid, but it isn't a sequel to eitherfranchise. Some schmucks decided that they wanted to hunt a giantpython that turned out to be a renegade human killer (big surprise). Itescaped and started hiding out in a water treatment plant (another bigsurprise). So the government gets a woman who is working withtransplants that can transmit animal brain waves and a guy with a giantboa (Houston, we have a title). So they sent this boa after the python(great idea, put two blood thirsty giant snakes in a confined areatogether). Throw in some special forces, idiot hunters going after thesnake and you've got a movie.This was pretty crappy. Forget it unless you love the giant CGI snakething.

marke b 2012-05-02 14:17:26

i agree with alligator_man2001

i loved this movie iam a big fan of anything that is a big animal eating peaple.i loved the python movies and anaconda(i hope the sequel is good)and boa.doing this just puts two of 3 giant snake movies together into one big one. there have been a lot of vs movies freddy vs jason vanhelsing and others. they should make anaconda vs pythonvs boa.that would be great.

Paul Andrews 2012-05-01 16:49:08

Pretty bad giant creature feature, so bad it's good film lovers rejoice!

Boa vs. Python starts as rich casino owner & big game hunter Broddick(Adamo Palladino) has a huge 80 foot Python imported from South EastAsia with the intention of staging a one of a kind hunt, however justoutside Phillidelphia the snake breaks free & disappears into someunderground tunnels. FBI Agent Sharpe (Kirk B.R. Woller) is on thecase, this guy has a pretty wild imagination because he flies in Monica(Jaime Bergman) from the Miami Marine Research Institute to help fit ahuge 80 foot Boa with special monitoring equipment because they intendto release the Boa which will hunt down the Python & bingo job done.However the FBI has more to worry about than just 80 foot snakes asBroddick still wants his hunt & Pillidelphia is as good a place as any,I mean so what if innocent people lose their lives...Directed by David Flores this is quite simply an incredible film, anincredible film for all the wrong reasons of course & one that you haveto see to believe. The script by Chase Parker & Sam Wells is absolutelypreposterous from start to finish, this really is one of the dumbest &stupidest films I've seen & it wouldn't surprise me if the filmmakerstook that as a compliment. At least it doesn't take itself seriously &I'm convinced the humour & silliness on show here is deliberatealthough I admit I didn't find any of it particularly funny. For astart the character's are awful, from dumb local cops to incompetentFBI agents to heavily armed soldiers who just stand there while someguy with a flame thrower turns them into human toast without firing asingle shot back. The dialogue is terrible, people reactions & decisionmaking is awful & you know your in trouble when they cast the likes ofPlayboy Playmate January 1999 Jaime Bergman as a brilliant marinescientist! You can't take the film seriously for a second, it's just soridiculous & the basic premise is totally moronic. To it's credit itmoves along like a rocket & provides some entertainment on a so badit's good level.Director Flores does OK I suppose, it looks nice enough although itdoes resemble flashy music videos & commercials at times. There's asurprising amount of female nudity on show here, it certainly outweighsthe gore side of things which is low as there's a couple of bitten inhalf bodies & that's it. There is also one priceless moment in Boa vs.Python the likes of which will probably never be repeated again, whilehaving oral sex with his girlfriend a guy is dragged off & killed bythe Python which then goes back & finishes the job off for him withit's slimy forked tongue! The snakes themselves aren't really in itenough & when they do eventually get to fight for all of 30 seconds atthe end it's rather pathetic & poorly animated. There are numerousclassic bad film moments throughout this that will go down in cinematichistory & really do have to be seen to be believed.Technically the film is alright, the snake CGI computer effects aren'ttoo bad generally speaking although some bits here & there areterrible. Set in Phillidelphia but actually filmed in Sofia inBulgaria. The less said about the acting on show here the better Ithink.Boa vs. Python is just one of those cinematic experiences which almostdefies explanation, it really is as ridiculous & dumb as it sounds butif you turn your brain off it might provide a few decent laughs.Impossible to recommend as it's terrible but there's a bit of fun to behad here if you look hard enough. Follows & brings together Python(2000), Python 2 (2002) & New Alcatraz (2002) which featured the 80foot Boa.

ORLANDO DIAZ 2012-04-30 14:33:24

What?!

Freddy Vs. Jason, Alien Vs. Predator and now-drum roll please...Boa Vs. Python! This low budget straight to dvd rubbish is so ridiculous it makes Anacondas look far superior by comparison. If the movie was campy it maybe would have work-but it takes itself so too seriously. One thing that was so frightening in this movie-The woman taking a bath in the beginning with that sponge! She should be washing the car with it instead-couldn't they afford to give her a loofah? Nope, the budget was spent on the hokey snake effects. What a pile of crap!

Prolox 2012-04-30 00:29:19

I was probably expecting to much.

Sequel to both BOA (NEW ALCATREZ) & PYTHON, has the two snake monsterssquaring off, while a group of people attempt to put a stop to thePython's reign of terror (Gobbling up the poor humans that itmistaken's for snake food) While I agree with many that this sequel wasmuch much better than the first two awful PYTHON movies (I'm yet to seeBOA) I was probably expecting too much out of this one, for startersthe two snakes don't actually battle one another until the final fiveminutes of the film & even then it's only a two minute fight that ain'tall that impressive, perhaps it's unfair to say so, since it is twosnake monsters (I mean what more can these guys do, bite one another &beat each other up with their own tails?) to be sure the film isentertaining, keeping you interested from beginning to end, with goodacting & the CGI wasen't all that fake looking this time, so if you'relooking for an all out snake brawl you'll be majorly disappointed, butif you're just looking for a piece of cheesy entertainment on the Bmovie level, then this film will no doubt satisfy you. But in allhonesty, since the brawl was really brief, a better title for this babywould have been BOA & PYTHON & not BOA vs. PYTHON.*** (stars)

nnguyen0297 2012-04-29 21:01:53

Well, what do you expect from Syfy?

This is one of the worst films ever made. But what do you expect from aSyfy film? The film is about a rich guy who buys a giant python, whichgets loose, and go on a killing spree. In order to kill it, the FBIagents go to some random snake scientist to borrow an over-sized boa tokill the python. At the same time, the rich guy hires some bountyhunters to hunt the python. I'm not going to reveal the rest, but I'lltell you it is awful. it has some of the worst CGI you'll ever see, andhad some of the worst acting, and corny dialog. Like I said, it's aSyfy film, so you don't expect much from it. I recommend you movielovers to don't watch any of the Syfy films because there're allterrible. If you like B movies with bad effects, bad acting, baddialog, giant snakes fighting to the death, and stupid rich guys whodoesn't know what they're doing, then go for it. Otherwise, don't. Igive it 1/5 stars.

zzoli 2012-04-29 04:24:05

hahaha

laughably bad movie following the track of earlier python and boafilms..... bad acting (really bad), bad story (how they put the twosnakes in one story with this unbelievably silly idea...), baddirecting, bad cameraman skills (unnesessery close-ups, silly slowmotions, except the shower scene.. :D ), bad special effects,.......bad everything!wanna see a good movie, don't go for this one!however if you are a big fan of B (or i should say C ) movies, like me,than this is one of the latest classics!2/10

Jenny 2012-04-23 09:50:51

Next, please.

So in this film there is a really rich guy who imports a giant pythonso he and his rich friends can hunt it. Well, that snake gets out anddecides to hide in the miles of water pipes outside of Philadelphia.The CIA finds out that this snake is on the loose and rather than justhunting it down and killing it, they decide to team up a snakespecialist with a woman who tracks dolphins using these sensors andcameras. Well, they attach these sensors to, what else, ANOTHER giantsnake. This one is a boa. Let me save you the suspense. The Boa layseggs from immaculate conception and the python "pleasures" a girl in ajeep in an abandoned field. There is a sponge bath scene, manyethnicities, underwater breathing, a flamethrower, and of course, arave. While I was highly anticipating this film, I must say that it isone of those B films that you should simply pass by at the video store.Pretty bad. I would instead recommend another helping of "Frankenfish."

nickelback_rules 2012-04-23 03:43:21

Really bad... *SPOILERS*

This movie sucks big time. Let me start off by saying the acting wasabsolutely terrible. Go to acting school. You're worse than HilaryDuff. After you get over the acting the special effects of the snakesare very terrible. I was laughing every time the snakes were on screen.And there are some plot holes too like... the runner of the big snakehunt says he's only inviting the rich and powerful, but dad and sonarrive in a station wagon saying "Wife got the truck". That son and dadwere the worse actors in this dreadful movie. That's saying something.The only good part of the movie was when that chick in the beginning ofthe film was washing naked in slow-mo. That was awesome. Other thanthat this movie sucked big time. Stay away. You'll never get overwatching this film if you don't.Rating 2/10